When we first meet someone we love, we’re in the throes of a profound moment.
We feel as if we’re being hugged and caressed by someone we really love.
And that’s when we know we’re on the right track.
And in some cases, we may feel like we’re falling in love, too.
That’s because we’re thinking about ourselves as partners.
We want to feel as though we’re loving someone else, too, and that our love for each other is more than a physical feeling.
In other words, we want to love ourselves.
“When we think about ourselves, we tend to be more concerned with our own happiness and well-being, so it’s easier to fall in love,” says Susan Litt, a clinical psychologist and author of the book The Love Connection: The Art and Science of Emotional Connection.
But there are some situations in which the physical love connection might be more important than we think.
For instance, if we feel loved, it makes us feel good, and it makes our partner feel loved too.
“It’s a way of thinking about being loved that can be beneficial for both people,” Litt says.
The Love Connections That Make You Feel Like You’re In Love: The Science of Physical Love Source: Recode/YouTube When you’re not sure if you’re in love or not, you can often feel like you’re being hurt or misunderstood by others.
In one study, researchers at Harvard University asked couples if they felt that they were in love and then asked them to rate how much they felt loved by their partners.
“The most significant difference between couples who felt loved and those who did not is in their perceptions of themselves and of their relationship,” lead researcher Jennifer Stahl writes in her study.
People who felt that their relationship was meaningful rated their partner as more important, and those that felt they weren’t were more concerned about their relationship.
“In our experience, love does have a strong emotional impact on both partners, whether they’re in a committed relationship or not,” Stahl says.
In fact, love is one of the strongest emotional connections, according to a recent study published in the journal Psychological Science.
“Our results suggest that in the presence of love, some individuals may find it easier to feel like they are in love than others,” says Stahl.
And this may lead to more positive feelings toward one another.
The same study also found that people who reported that they felt in love with their partner also reported feeling less negative emotions toward their partner.
The science behind the love connection is pretty clear.
“Love is the connection between the two people and it’s the glue that holds their relationship together,” Latt says.
“But the more we connect, the more likely we are to experience negative emotions.”
The Love Relationships That Can Make You Think You’re in Love: How to Find Love in a Relationship Without Having to Ask Source: Thinkstock And love can also be a powerful tool for finding love.
When we’re unsure of our love connection, our feelings are amplified, says Lisa Auerbach, a certified clinical psychologist in Los Angeles and author the book Love Is a Weapon: How To Find Love Without Fear.
“If we feel like the connection is not real, our heart rate increases and we’re more vulnerable to the negative emotions we’re experiencing,” she says.
And then, we end up feeling like we need to ask someone to help us find love in the moment.
“We have to be willing to be a little bit more vulnerable, even though we don’t know whether that vulnerability is going to be beneficial,” she adds.
“And we have to have a sense of humor about our feelings, which can help us to overcome our fears.”
Litt is a certified marriage and family therapist in Los, California, and is an assistant professor at the University of Arizona’s school of psychology.
You can watch the video below to learn more about love and its benefits, or listen to this episode of Recode’s The Love Show.
We’ve also recorded a podcast of our favorite conversations with experts in the field.
And if you want to find a therapist near you, check out our guide to finding a certified counselor.